5 Powerful & Effective Tools for Ongoing Transformation
As human beings we have an amazing capacity to make ongoing change through our choices and actions. With willingness, determination, openness and good support, transformation in any area of life is possible. Below are some suggestions of different tools to use to catalyze change in your life. The journey of transformation is constant and ongoing and mostly within in our control. All of the tools below can be used simultaneously or at different phases of your life to suit your needs. It may all seem overwhelming at first, so just choose one or two practices to experiment and play with and then gradually add or substitute other tools whenever relevant. Print this booklet and refer to it regularly. Enjoy the journey.
1. Know Thyself – Who are you really and what are you here for? Do you know what your core values are and what’s most important to you? What motivates you? Knowing who you are and what’s important to you is your true compass and guiding force at times of challenge and adversity. Imagine being clear on who you are and what matters most. Here are 3 ways to LIVE IT:
Awaken to Your True Self – Easier said than done, I know. But seriously, if you don’t have a direct knowing of who you really are, which is beyond your roles, ideas, concepts and projections of who you are, I strongly encourage you to make this a project. Set the intention to awaken to your truest essence and explore opportunities that support this. Ex. Take an Enlightenment/Illumination Intensive or Vipassna Retreat. I do a process with my clients that often results in this ‘knowing of who you are’ within a couple of hours.
Clarify Your Values – Brainstorm all the things that are important to you – from the list of values below make a list of your top 10, then the top 5 and if you like, your top 3 and presto you have your core values! Feel free to create your own names for them. These are your guiding forces, something to base important decisions from. When faced with making a decision, ask yourself "is choosing this in alignment with my core values or from a place of reaction or fear?"
What’s Important - Do a *dyad with a friend or loved one using the instruction: ‘Tell me what’s important to you.’ Set a timer for 40 minutes and go back and forth. Be curious, open and willing to discover something new about yourself, as you go deeper you will tend to discover your deeper truth.
2. Cultivate Self-Love & Acceptance – Did you notice that when you are in love with yourself everything flows with more ease and less effort? When you are feeling self-critical how open is your heart? When our hearts are open we are able to enjoy ourselves more and allow the goodness of life in. It’s important to keep noticing and working with our nourishment barriers. Ever-growing our capacity to give and receive love and goodness will continue to transform our ability to enjoy ourselves, life and others. Imagine being fully in love with yourself and life. Here are 3 ways to LIVE IT:
Love Letter – A beautiful way to start the day is writing a love letter to yourself – this exercise was inspired by SARK. It can be a letter from your ‘inner wise self’, ‘your higher self’, or simply ‘your Self’. Open your heart and see what flows.
Eye/Soul Gazing – Spending a few minutes each day looking into your own eyes, connecting with your own soul and thinking or even saying out loud kind and loving things to yourself is a great way to affirm and cultivate self-love. A lovely thing to do is to read your love letter to yourself while looking into your own eyes.
Day End Celebration - At the end of each day review your accomplishments and blessings. Celebrate all of your wins and learnings, no matter how big or small. If there is anything that you don’t feel good about vow to make it right or act differently the next time.
3. Stay Juiced - What nourishes and inspires you? When you start to get run down, weary and discouraged where do you get replenishment and renewed faith? Imagine having a solid source of nourishment and faith. Here are 3 ways to LIVE IT:
Connect with Nature – Schedule regular time out in nature; walking, hiking, swimming, cycling, even just sitting or lying on the earth. Nature offers fresh perspective and helps us connect to what is natural, wholesome and good. Take deep breaths and allow the energy of nature to flood your cells with goodness and open to inspiration.
Creative Expression – It’s important to take time to allow the force of life to flow through you in creative ways, this exercises and awakens your right brain and allows for more creativity and ingenuity in your work. Choose some form of artistic/creative expression to explore just for the fun of it, who knows what you may discover or unleash! (Ex. music, dance, collage, painting, pottery, calligraphy, jewelry making, etc.).
Inspirational Role Models – Seek out people who inspire you and are living the life and exhibit the qualities of being that you admire and aspire to. Take time to read, listen or watch material from them or about them. It’s important to be conscious and deliberate about who you spend your time with & how.
4. Take 100% Responsibility - If you’re not the one taking responsibility for your life then who is? Where does your power go when you blame someone or something else for what’s happening in your life? Imagine what is possible when you are fully responsible for and the creator of your own experiences and life. Here are 3 ways to LIVE IT:
Get Real – Take stock of your life in all areas (health, relationships, career, spirituality, finances, recreation, etc.), assess where you are and where you want to be and make some clear and precise choices (that include specific actions) that will begin to grow your fulfillment in the areas you want to improve.
Right or Happy? – Practice recognizing and acknowledging when you are out of integrity or making someone else responsible for your experience. This is both a very humbling and empowering experience and people will appreciate your honesty and begin to trust you more and more. Start by owning what you have said or done that you aren’t happy with, identify the underlying need or desire and do your best to find a way to express yourself. Remember practice makes perfect.
Blissipline - Prioritize what’s important to you and what gives you joy and nourishment. Make a solid commitment to doing those things on an ongoing basis and actually schedule them into your calendar. (Ex. Rise & Shine – Be very intentional about how you start your day, it sets the tone for all that you do and how you do it. What gets you centered, in your body, in a good frame of mind, energized, uplifted and open? Meditation, brisk walk in nature, yoga, qi gong, dancing, inspirational reading, music, painting, etc. Explore and discover...)
5. Open to & Receive Support – Would you rather struggle on your own and stay caught in your patterns and blind spots or get help to have new perspectives and fresh energy to propel you forward? Don’t you find working with others brings more ease and enjoyment to whatever you are doing? Imagine having an amazing team of support that you can call upon at times of challenge or even to share your greatest joys and celebrations with. Here are 3 ways to LIVE IT:
Consciously Open Practice – Alone or with a partner, alternate between consciously choosing to open to support and consciously choosing to close to support. If alone notice what thoughts arise, how you feel in your body and what emotions arise after each choice. If with a partner, take some time to share with your partner about the experience and take turns – like a dyad. Do this for about 10-20 minutes.
Practice Asking for Help – Learn to catch those times when you are struggling (and may be feeling proud or stubborn) and consciously choose to ask for help. People appreciate and enjoy being able to be of service and often love the opportunity to contribute.
Invest in Yourself – If you are committed to making serious and lasting change in your life it is extremely powerful, effective and even necessary at times to pay for professional help. Depending on what you are struggling with or aspiring to you can take courses or workshops, join related support groups or hire a counselor or coach.
IF YOU ARE READY AND WILLING TO MAKE POWERFUL AND LASTING CHANGE IN YOUR LIFE THEN PLEASE CONTACT ME FOR A FREE CLARITY SESSION TO SEE HOW WE CAN WORK TOGETHER TO CREATE THE TRANSFORMATION AND THE LIFE THAT YOU KNOW IN YOUR HEART IS POSSIBLE. WHETHER WE CHOOSE TO WORK TOGETHER I AM FULLY COMMITTED TO YOU LEAVING OUR SESSION COMPLETELY INSPIRED AND EXCITED TO CREATE A LIFE YOU ARE JUICED ABOUT.
BONUS: Practice Gratitude – How angry or frustrated or upset can you be when you are feeling grateful? Is there any sense of ‘wrong’ when you are experiencing gratitude? How does your heart and body feel when you are feeling grateful? Pause for a moment, close your eyes and recall how you feel when you experience gratitude. Imagine cultivating this feeling and living it more and more each day. Here are 3 ways to LIVE IT:
Before each meal spend some time to give thanks for the food and send a blessing to whoever and whatever was responsible for the food being available to you (the growers, the harvesters, the cooks, the sun, the earth, the rain, etc.). Being fully present to your food and all the energy that went into it enables you to enjoy your meal to the fullest and glean full nourishment on all levels.
Reframe: When experiencing a challenging situation or event see how you can shift your perspective to see what’s available to you and be able to find the gratitude in your heart for the opportunity for change and growth. Try to list 5-10 things to be grateful for about the situation.
At the end of the day either on your own, with a friend or with a loved one speak or write down at least 5 things that you are grateful for that day. It’s even more powerful if you clarify the why and end with saying, ‘thank you’ a few times with full heart and meaning. You can start a gratitude journal to look back on when you need to be reminded.
*Dyad is a sacred/formal form of communication between 2 people. Usually a time frame is set but not necessary. One person is the speaker and the other the listener. The listener speaks the instruction to the speaker then listens with as much presence, compassion and acceptance is possible without any judgment or comment. When the speaker is finished the listener says ‘thank you’, which means ‘I understand’ not necessarily agree. Then the roles reverse.
Values List ___Achievement - accomplishment, results brought about by persistence
___Adventure/Excitement - risk, action, fast pace
___Beauty/Aesthetic Value - appreciation and enjoyment of beauty
___Autonomy - personal freedom, independence, making your own choices
___Creativity/Self-Expression - developing new ideas, designs or solutions
___Emotional Well-Being - peace of mind, quickly resolving inner conflicts
___Physical Health - sound and strong body
___Honesty/Authenticity - being genuinely yourself with others
___Humor/Wit - a sense of humor, seeing things in perspective
___Intellectual Challenge - learning new things, stimulating the mind
___Justice/Fairness - treating others impartially, wanting equity for others
___Knowledge - seeking truth, curiosity for information
___Love/Family - affection, intimacy, attachment to a family
___Loyalty - maintaining allegiance to a person, group or cause